I Lost My Best Friend

About five weeks ago my best friend and I made plans to go to the movies. We decide on a late movie because we had to make sure our respective kids were tucked in bed before we went out for some mom fun. Our plan was to leave at 9pm for a 10pm movie.

9:00pm - No best friend
9:15pm - No best friend and best friend isn't picking up her cell phone
9:30pm - No best friend, no cell, no texts
9:45pm - Yep, you guessed it....no best friend
10pm - Best friend texts and asks if I'm ready to go. I tell her that it's too late and that I am upset that she didn't even call or text to tell me she'd be late. Her reply? "I was with my family. Don't know what to say other than that." And with that....the friendship vanished.

She stood me up and didn't even apologize. Didn't even own up to her error. And now, a month later I've even been unfriended on Facebook. What did I do to deserve that? Maybe she wasn't as good a friend as I thought? She was the one who'd go out for our nightly mom fun....ok maybe it's not fun to most, but going grocery shopping and laughing your butt off in the isles is fun to me! We shared everything. We talked about everything.

And now, here I am and I miss my best friend so much. She lives right across the street. I know she sees me and I know I see her. And all I want to do is go over, give her a big hug and tell her how much I miss her. What I can't figure out is why me? She messed up. Not me. Does she not miss me? Does she not know how much she hurt me? Am I being totally pathetic?

I lost my best friend and I'm having a hard time finding the blessings in that. I've spent more time at home and I know my husband loves that, but I miss the talks, the laughter and the vent sessions. I miss late night work outs and shopping expeditions. I miss it to my core. If you love someone, set them free? I hate this.